Dear 18-Year-Old Me

Welcome to the Letters of Wonder, where I explore insights on wealth, fulfillment, growth, and mastery.

Why Write This?

I’ve been thinking about the journey that’s brought me here. Reflecting on my younger self, I realize how much he could have benefited from the lessons I’ve learned along the way. (Though, let’s be honest—he probably wouldn’t have listened…)

So, here’s a letter to you, 18-year-old me, who’s just beginning and full of questions and doubts.

Random quote because hopefully you’d listen to Einstein if not me.

Self-Discovery: Where You Are Now

Am I willing to look closely at my habits, routines, and the people around me, and be honest about what’s holding me back? (Or am I going to pretend everything’s fine because that’s easier.)

Step 1: Identify Your Current “Defaults”

Start by thinking about where you currently are. Write down the three biggest habits, routines, or relationships that don’t align with the future version of you.

Examples might look like:

• Drinking soda at 2 a.m.

• Hanging out with that old drunkard, Tommy, daily

• Watching TV and scrolling on my phone at the same time (it lowkey hits though)

• Sleeping in most of the day and repeating that every day (actually the trippiest loop)

Step 2: Create a “To-Don’t” List

Everyone makes a to-do list. Here’s something more unique.

Instead of just creating a “to-do” list, try making a “to-don’t” list.

Start writing down what you’re willing to stop doing.

If you don’t know what you need to stop doing, ask your family or your friends who you look up to.

The key here isn’t to go cold-turkey. You can give it a shot, but it’s a whole lot easier making small changes. Soon it’ll feel natural.

Gradually reduce the time or frequency of each thing you want to let go of.

Examples:

• Drinking alcohol – solution: drink less

• Scrolling social media – solution: scroll less

• Waking up late – solution: wake up less... shit, I mean earlier

Step 3: Build Your Calendar

They say your calendar is a reflection of your life.

It’s okay if you don’t use a calendar now. No, not the one mom uses to track her dental appointments on the wall.

I’d recommend Google Calendar. Apple Calendar is not it.

Organize your calendar to align with your goals. Then start saying “no” to things that don’t support who you’re becoming.

I’m not saying you have to say “no” to everything forever.

Just for now, until you make the changes needed and stick to them. Okay maybe it might seem like forever.

It’ll be tough, especially when your friends know you as the “yes” guy. But trust me—they’ll understand.

And if they don’t, they (probably) aren’t the friends you want in your future. Unless they also embark upon the (not so) treacherous path.

Each “no” is a “yes” to the person you’re becoming. You’ll get more comfortable with this over time as you change your identity.

And no, “changing your identity” does not mean a new passport.

Inner Growth: Becoming Your Higher Self

Am I ready to be alone with my thoughts and face the truths I might have been avoiding? (Or will I keep pretending I’m “too busy” for that?)

Step 1: Keep Journaling

Journaling helps you go deep and gain clarity, even when it might be a bit scary to go deep.

Here are four things (2 to improve, 2 to achieve) you can write about daily to get started:

• Fears

• Frustrations

• Goals

• Future Self

Step 2: Find Feedback from People You Trust

Reach out to a few people you respect and ask them to share what they see as your unique strengths or areas for growth.

This isn’t easy because it requires vulnerability (And yes, you’re probably going to hear things you didn’t ask for).

But if you can do it, you’ll fast-track your growth.

Step 3: Build Your Anti-Vision

Imagine life in five years if you don’t make these changes.

Where would you be? Who would you be around? What would you be doing?

Write down the habits and patterns you’d still be stuck in, the frustrations that would grow, and the missed opportunities.

This anti-vision should be your wake-up call.

Keep it somewhere you’ll see often. Maybe tape it to the bathroom mirror. Or on your toilet. Idk.

Life Hack for tech nerds (and everyone else): Use ChatGPT to help you act in the best way possible. When faced with choices, describe what you’re going through and ask, “What would my highest self do?” Follow its guidance where it feels reasonable and true.

Career Path: Becoming Self-Employed

Am I the person who is truly ready to take responsibility for my vision and face uncertainty with resilience? (Or am I just hoping everything magically falls into place?)

Step 1: Choose a Path

Here are a few paths to consider:

• Content

• Service

• Product (probably you if you liked the chatgpt hack above)

Step 2: Experiment for One Month

Spend a month testing your choice. (Remember, don’t quit. Rather, assess how you feel and PICK ONE.)

If you’re leaning toward content, try creating some and posting it or just learning about the content world.

For a service, think about what you’d offer and plan out how you’d deliver it. Or just learn about the service world.

For a product, build a prototype or map out your idea. Or just learn about the product world.

Okay it’s been months. Maybe you don’t feel like you’re making massive progress, but look at the little things.

You’re now waking up earlier, actually drinking water or discussing ideas with a new group of friends.

These small actions are the foundation for bigger changes—they’re subtle but they add up!

Exercise: Keep notes on your energy and engagement after each experiment. This can help you find what resonates most. Also notice this new person you’re becoming (yes yes even if your “business” isn’t working).

Step 3: Find the Intersection of Interest + Demand

Okay you’ve built yourself into the person that is disciplined, consistent and hungry.

Now let’s take it a step further.

Keep building and ideating and stumbling around.

Success will come when you land on something you can sustain that also has demand in the market.

And yes, it’s tough to find that sweet spot immediately.

But hey… look at the progress you’ve made!

You now talk about ideas, hang around other ambitious people, don’t binge-watch Netflix till 3 a.m., and don’t make brainless jokes (okay, maybe that last one is still a work in progress).

Side Note: 99% of people want to work on something else, but don’t take action. That’s okay if you want to take your time. Just DON’T get stuck in thinking mode for too long. You’ll know yourself.

Relationships: Connecting with the Right People

Am I willing to surround myself with people who support and challenge me in equal measure, and let go of connections that no longer align? (Or am I sticking around just to avoid a few awkward conversations?)

Step 1: Start by Embracing Where You Are (While Still Working on Yourself)

Building meaningful relationships doesn’t require you to be at the “perfect” place in your life.

Every connection begins from where you genuinely are. Don’t feel you have to be someone else, or “more” than you are right now, to connect deeply.

Instead, start by being true to yourself and your own journey.

You may feel 10 steps behind some people—and that’s okay. You don’t need everything figured out to form genuine connections.

Sometimes, the skills, interests, or experiences you already have can make you stand out in surprising ways (people have done more with less).

Begin by embracing your own path and seeing what you can learn from those around you.

The more genuine you are, the more likely you are to attract authentic connections.

Working on yourself will help tremendously.

Step 2: Reach Out with Genuine Curiosity

When you reach out to others, come from a place of genuine curiosity.

Don’t reach out just to fill a need; connect because you’re truly interested in them and in learning from their journey.

If it feels like you’re filling a need, umm maybe meditate more.

Side Note: This will take time to feel this way with everyone. Maybe I need to meditate more.

Share your own goals, ask about their experiences, and stay open.

People will often be more supportive when they sense your sincerity.

But if it ever feels like you’re just seeking shortcuts or validation, take a step back and reconnect with yourself first. Reconnect as in uhh.. meditate.

Step 3: Lean Into Positive Energy

Notice how people respond to you.

Pay attention to those whose energy feels encouraging and aligns with the kind of person you want to become.

Lean into relationships where there’s a natural flow.

Relationships are often an energy game. The more in tune you are with your own energy, the more you’ll naturally attract people who reflect that energy.

In the end, relationships that feel right are the ones where you don’t have to pretend to be someone else.

I get it, the guy you’re pretending to be like is super cool.

But remember…

So the more in tune you are with yourself, the more in tune you will be with others around you.

People who genuinely resonate with you will reflect back the best parts of yourself.

You’ll find that the right friendships, partnerships, and mentors will encourage you to grow.

Interestingly, they will also make you feel at ease being yourself.

Become the person you want to attract.

And actually though, meditate more; it really helps.

Oh and here’s one final note:

Keep having fun along the way. I’m still figuring out the puzzle at 23... Maybe I’ll rewrite this letter to my current self when I’m 28.

Feel free to reply directly to this email. I’d love to hear your reflections.

Thanks for reading!