The Other Side of Ambition That No One Talks About

Welcome to Letters of Wonder — a space to explore the truths behind clarity, creation, and what it means to live a truly wonderful life.

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How Can I Be Both?

I’ve been feeling something deeply over the last few days.

It’s this question I can’t stop coming back to:
How do I balance ambition and presence?

Over the last few years, I’ve been incredibly locked in—on business, fitness, building systems, scaling, pushing forward.

Every day has been about execution, structure, speed and progress.

You get the point.

But then there's this other side.

A softer, quieter side I’ve been observing a lot more lately.

The side that wants stillness, presence and awareness.

What Threw Me Off

Suddenly, I felt disoriented.

Questions raced through my head:
Did we mess up? Were we in the wrong?

My mind spiraled and panic hit.

It was strange because I hadn’t felt any of that all day.

I was in go-mode with no distractions.

But that email cracked fully opened something.

It reminded me:
When you're always pushing, you're never really expecting emotions to hit. Until they do.

The Two Sides of Me

That moment made me sit with a bigger question:

How can I be both?

How can I be the guy who executes, pushes, builds relentlessly
...and also the guy who is calm, grounded, and full of presence and love energy?

Because I’ve been both.

There are days when I’m fully in execution mode:

• Locked in at the gym, headphones on.

• Recording content, back-to-back.

• Deep work on the business.

• Taking meetings, solving problems, building.

And then there are days where I’m the complete opposite:

• Walking my dog in silence.

• Sitting at the park with no agenda.

• Meditating on a bench for an hour.

• Letting nature move me.

Both of these versions of me are real.

And both of them are beautiful.

The hard part is mixing the two.

How Both Have Helped Me

The structured, driven side of me is the reason I:

• Built a real business that generates revenue (currently working on making profit better lol).

• Got out of day-to-day operations and signed some amazing clients.

• Developed systems and brought on wonderful team members.

It’s also why I’ve been able to:

• Build more freedom and structure in my life

• Be consistent with this newsletter (let’s pray the streak keeps going)

• And make progress in the gym (check below if curious - might write a newsletter on fitness journey?)

That drive has shaped my identity into someone who doesn’t quit (at least, I would like to believe so).

But then here’s where it gets tricky.

What If It All Falls Apart?

What happens when I get sick and can’t work out?

What if a client drops?

What if a moment hits (like that email) and my identity gets rattled?

When your identity is built only around pushing, these moments suck because they turn existential so fast.

And yes, I could “push through” those cracks too.

But is that really the path?

Or is it just more ego?

Who I Truly Am

I think I’m starting to see it.

This identity of the executor and the doer is not who I truly am.

Who I truly am is the observer: the presence behind all of it.

And from that place, I get to take on these beautiful human roles:

• The builder.

• The content creator.

• The leader.

• The gym rat.

I get to play them with joy and not attachment.

Because nothing here is permanent.

Not my business.
Not my body.
Not even my best ideas.

And knowing that doesn’t make me passive. It makes me more clear on living life.

There’s a beautiful video by Eckhart Tolle I’ve been watching, which I wanted to share here:

A Reminder as I Build

This is what I would remind myself:

• Don’t build your identity solely around being the executor.

• Yes, show up. Yes, be disciplined. Yes, create value.

• But don’t cling to it.

Live with structure and intensity, but hold it all lightly.

Because you are:

• No the business.

• Not the body

• Not the title or the bank account

You are the observer behind it all.

And yes.. even from that place, you can still build beautiful things.

In fact, I’m starting to think you can build even more beautiful things.

Because your work is now purely for creation.

I want to end with this.

It’s easy to see success and get lost in it. To think you are better than others or to think you are of a different breed.

But the more I try be present, the more I feel that the right approach is to let things pass, and not attach to them.

Let nothing be your identity.

Be the witness behind it all.

And as always, this again, is more of a reminder to myself than anything else.

Because this isn’t something you do once and get done with.

It is a constant practice, just like anything else in life.

Hope you enjoyed.